The End

You need to know

that the rain will come and cleanse your soul,

it will sting and burn and hurt you so,

but in the end you’ll think you know

and then you’ll see how real it was,

and then you’ll laugh until your bones

ache and burn and hurt you so,

and so you’ll laugh and cry until you know

the end has come and you’ll wish you knew

that it’s all done and you’ll cry and laugh

and then you’ll sob your very last.

 

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Coffee Time

 

I don’t judge

No sirree

People are

Who they are

I don’t judge

No sirree

What you say?

 

The lump is back

 

Broken teeth

Yellowing

Lips are thin

Anger’s in

 

Listen now

 

From Cadle Street

To old Town Hill

Safety found

In Gwyrosydd still

 

There is no time

 

I don’t judge

My lips are thin

Shadow puppets

Soon swarm in

 

 

Listen please

 

I need a life

You have to see

You’re the first

She waved at me

 

Thelema

 

Peronni please

Then I’ll  drive

I do not judge

My lips are thin

 

Tick tock

 

She came home drunk

Many times

Popeye Phil

Fell down the hill

 

Time’s run out

 

Don’t judge

Hate self

Love all

Please call

 

I feel the lump

 

It  unravels

If I look at it

 

Deadly Mission

Poison flows throughout the blood,

A deadly mission,

Of that no doubt.

 

Needle hurts going in,

Days that follow taste like tin.

Escape the body,

Calm the mind,

Call the nurse,

Some are kind.

My numbers say it’s worth the pain,

I nod along to convince my brain.

 

Poison done and  drip comes out,

There is a future,

Must not doubt.

One More Kiss

Secret thoughts, guilty lies,

I turn the head and avoid the eyes,

I said I was sorry but it didn’t mean much

Is there time for one more kiss?

 

Tell myself I have the right,

Tell myself that no one died.

I said I was sorry but it didn’t mean much

Will you give me one more kiss?

 

So sorry now you caught me in another lie

So sorry now I made you really want to die

So sorry now but I really need to ask for this

Can there be another kiss?

I won’t ask for more,

A final kiss.

 

 

No Amends

Pours a wine

Hard to find

Knows he left

Not her best

Takes a drink

Indistinct

What he said

Not again

Bright light tonight

 

Searches every night

But she is denied

No choice

Couldn’t take her voice

Now he will not leave

He’s in her head

He wishes that

He were dead

Bright light tonight

 

Dreams of other men

He must make amends

Holds his hand once more

Now she’s truly bored

Tried so long

Couldn’t be that strong

And she’s in his head

And he’s nearly dead

Bright light tonight

 

Bright light tonight

 

Love Story

I love my Mam and Dad,

Although they made me sad

Some time ago

I think they know

I love my Mam and Dad

 

I thank my Mam and Dad

Although some days were bad

Long time ago

We all must grow

I thank my Mam and Dad

 

I’ll miss my Mam and Dad

Of that I’m truly glad

As  nights draw in

And I grow thin

I’ll miss my Mam and Dad

I will

I am more than in the here and now

I am more than just last week

I am more than what you think of me

I am more than what you seek

I am the one who lived my childhood

I am the one who worked so hard

I am the one who thought she knew the truth

I am the one who dropped her guard

I will be the highest part of me

I will be the strongest one

I will be the things I need to be

My story isn’t done

 

Testing Times

Musty dust and mouldy cheese

Creaky neck and broken knees,

Strangers in and strangers out

Try to breathe, must not shout,

Rest awhile, you need your strength

Scalpel teases tumor’s length ,

Then the burning, will it hurt?

Still I nag, responses curt,

Shoulder pain, I snap and roar,

Then I’m sorry,  just so sore,

It’s time to fight and not give up

A drop of hope refills my cup.

 

 

Homesick

I have to sing a sad old song

I have to bash the  keys

I have to cry a bit today

I’ll hide away the tears

 

I long to be a child again

I miss my slopey street.

 

Babs and John

And Al and Jo

Nonny Niggle too,

I think about the times we shared

I wish you missed me too

 

So here I am

At forty five

At least I’m not alone

Dem and Pete

I love you both

Your smiles mean I am home.