One More Kiss

Secret thoughts, guilty lies,

I turn the head and avoid the eyes,

I said I was sorry but it didn’t mean much

Is there time for one more kiss?

 

Tell myself I have the right,

Tell myself that no one died.

I said I was sorry but it didn’t mean much

Will you give me one more kiss?

 

So sorry now you caught me in another lie

So sorry now I made you really want to die

So sorry now but I really need to ask for this

Can there be another kiss?

I won’t ask for more,

A final kiss.

 

 

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No Amends

Pours a wine

Hard to find

Knows he left

Not her best

Takes a drink

Indistinct

What he said

Not again

Bright light tonight

 

Searches every night

But she is denied

No choice

Couldn’t take her voice

Now he will not leave

He’s in her head

He wishes that

He were dead

Bright light tonight

 

Dreams of other men

He must make amends

Holds his hand once more

Now she’s truly bored

Tried so long

Couldn’t be that strong

And she’s in his head

And he’s nearly dead

Bright light tonight

 

Bright light tonight

 

Love Story

I love my Mam and Dad,

Although they made me sad

Some time ago

I think they know

I love my Mam and Dad

 

I thank my Mam and Dad

Although some days were bad

Long time ago

We all must grow

I thank my Mam and Dad

 

I’ll miss my Mam and Dad

Of that I’m truly glad

As  nights draw in

And I grow thin

I’ll miss my Mam and Dad

I will

I am more than in the here and now

I am more than just last week

I am more than what you think of me

I am more than what you seek

I am the one who lived my childhood

I am the one who worked so hard

I am the one who thought she knew the truth

I am the one who dropped her guard

I will be the highest part of me

I will be the strongest one

I will be the things I need to be

My story isn’t done

 

Testing Times

Musty dust and mouldy cheese

Creaky neck and broken knees,

Strangers in and strangers out

Try to breathe, must not shout,

Rest awhile, you need your strength

Scalpel teases tumor’s length ,

Then the burning, will it hurt?

Still I nag, responses curt,

Shoulder pain, I snap and roar,

Then I’m sorry,  just so sore,

It’s time to fight and not give up

A drop of hope refills my cup.

 

 

Homesick

I have to sing a sad old song

I have to bash the  keys

I have to cry a bit today

I’ll hide away the tears

 

I long to be a child again

I miss my slopey street.

 

Babs and John

And Al and Jo

Nonny Niggle too,

I think about the times we shared

I wish you missed me too

 

So here I am

At forty five

At least I’m not alone

Dem and Pete

I love you both

Your smiles mean I am home.

 

 

 

Ebenezer Lost

Long time ago

Inside my head

Ebenezer rocked

Though he was dead.

Then came the king

To sing a song

To rule the world –

He didn’t last long.

Some time ago

Inside my head

A different voice came

That made me  scared.

Then came life’s work

To test me so

I think I passed

But even so

I’m well wrung out

And nearly half dead

I miss Ebenezer –

He danced in my head

Not Yet

I thought by now I’d have the words

To see you on your way,

I thought by now I’d have the sense

To ignore the things you  say,

I thought by now  I’d have the strength

To let this anger go,

I thought by now I’d have the grace

To forgive what’s gone before.

But  still that day has  not yet come and so my chest pulls tight

I think about your hurtful words and cry throughout the night.

 

Dusty Thoughts

Up too early, head a buzz

Of hopes and dreams and other stuff

That may some day come to pass.

Far away now, of course.

 

My throat aches, my hip is sore

And my twitching legs drive me mad.

More camphor please I say to him.

 

I will breathe in and out then turn to dust.

They’ll sweep me up

And throw me out.

 

Dust – the thing I hate the most.

It clogs my pores, it aches my throat

(My hip is sore you know.)

I make a plan

To avoid all multiples of three.

 

Feelings follow thoughts

Said a wise old salesman once,

So I change the tune

And laugh a bit, for once.

 

I write some things.

The buzzing stops.

I go back to bed to toss and turn a bit.